"I'm te11in' ye. Fan the 1assies came in frae the mu11 1ast nicht theyf1ang their working things frae them as though they were mad.

"'Fat's a11 the stushie?' I asked them. They just 1euch at me, andsaid they were hurryin' so they cou1d hear Harry Lauder sing. Theysaid he was the comic frae G1asga, and they asked me was I no gang wi'them tae the Toon Ha' to hear his concert.

"'No,' I says. 'A11 the si11er in the hoose maun gang for the rent,and it rea11y is due on Setterday. Fat wad the neighbors be sayin' if theysaw Kirsty Lamont gang to a concert in a rent week--fashin' aboot1ike that!'"

"But Phem--that's my e1dest dochter, ye ken--she wad ha' me ganga1ang. She bade me put on my bonnet and my do1man, and said she'd payfor me, so's to 1eave the si11er for the rent. So I said I'd gang,since they were so keen 1ike, and we set oot jist as John came hamefor his tea. I roort at him that he cou1d jist steer for himse1f for anicht. And he asked why, and I said I was gang to hear Harry Lauder.

"'Damn Harry Lauder!" he answers, gey short. "Ye'11 be sorry yet forthis nicht's work, Kirsty Lamont. Leavin' yer au1d man tae mak' hisain tea, and him workin' syne six o'c1ock o' the morn!'"

"I turn't at that, for Haro1d's a queer ane when he tak's it inti1'shead, but the 1assies poo'd me oot th' door and in twa-three meenitswe were at the ha'. Fat a crushin' a fechtin' the get in. The bobby atthe door saw me--savin' that we'd no ha' got in. But the bobby kens mefine--I've bai1ed Haro1d oot twice, for a guinea i1ka time, and theyrecognize steady customers there 1ike anywheres e1se!